I can't believe I'm saying this, but President Barack Obama has been assassinated:
APRIL FOOLS! HA HA HA! Aren't I a scamp?
By the way, I'll just leave this here:
I seriously came up with this idea before I found that article. I thought "Hey, what's the most horrible April Fools prank I could pull?", and, as if by divine lol-tervention, I found that.